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Letting Go

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Letting go…
Release…
Forgiveness…

These three daily practices are the gateway to freedom, but when tried, they have been found to be too hard for too many.

In Galatians 5:1 Paul states: “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” All of Christ’s work for people finds its apex in freedom. If this is true, then why are so many so stuck? We are stuck because we surrender to the wrong things.

We surrender to what other people want us to be and never become who we were created to be…

We surrender to the gods of materialism and debt cementing us in a place we don’t want to dwell…

We surrender to culture and become a copy of everyone else…

We surrender to someone else’s idea of success and spend our lives trying to gain what will never satisfy…

We surrender to the image police and never like ourselves…

Bob Dylan said it this way:

But you’re gonna have to serve somebody, yes indeed
You’re gonna have to serve somebody
Well, it may be the devil or it may be the Lord
But you’re gonna have to serve somebody

We all have a master, the question that needs to be asked is, “Is your master immersing you in freedom or bondage?”

Jesus came and freed those who would follow Him and live His kingdom life, but as Paul notes, we can choose, as a follower of Christ, to allow other things to take control. If you are a Christian and find yourself stuck, shackled, or drowning, then you have allowed something else besides Christ to be master.

When we sink into depression because someone speaks negatively about us, we have just given that person power and control.

When we live in so much debt that we are sinking in it, we have allowed Chase or whatever financial institution to become our master.

When we hold onto anger, bitterness or unforgiveness, we have allowed our hurt or another person to have control.

Jesus wants everyone to experience a life of freedom, joy, and abundance, and this kind of life can only be experienced when we live the way Christ told us to live.

There are three freedom killers that everyone needs to be aware of: Expectations, Attachments and Control.

The Bar is Too High

When we have expectations that are too high, no one and nothing can get over the bar. When people fail to meet our expectations, we tend to get angry, judgmental or even depressed. Grace is needed for the person who sets the bar too high or they will never enjoy the beauty of relationships with others or God, as people rarely meet all expectations. Let go of unrealistic expectations…Release the high bar… Forgive the person, and begin to taste the sweetness of freedom.

Stuck Like Duct Tape

We all love duct tape, but when we are so attached to our desires that we hold tenaciously with a death grip, we get stuck like duct tape, and that is really stuck! Holding so tightly to “stuff & things” places those things in the drivers seat, and the sovereignty of God moves into the back seat. When God is not where we are primarily tethered, we lose our freedom and we wonder where God went. He is still there waiting for you to let go of your attachment to things. When we trust God and believe He is good, we release our expectations and our attachment to things…then we regain our freedom. If I do not trust God or believe He is good, I will continue to hold on tightly to what I want or what I expect from others.

Remote Control

Everyone is a control freak to some extent, but some people allow have an excessive need to control and it destroys their lives and the freedom Christ died for. We try to control our spouse, our kids, our boss, our government, our bank, and even our friends. “If they would just do what I say, then everything would be great!” is the conscious or subconscious life commandment. The need to control is insidious and it destroys freedom. It’s yoke crushes all who give in to it. Even when we realize that we can’t control the world, we still live and act as if we can, and this ruptures relationships, our soul and our faith. God alone is sovereign, I am not. The sooner I release my need to control…the sooner I forgive the ones I want to control…and the sooner I let go of my need to control, the sooner I swim in the ocean of God’s freedom.

Open Hands

The image of open palms is the image of freedom.

Open palms hold things loosely…
Open palms release the tight fist of control…
Open palms reveal trust..

Clenched fists are the image of bondage…holding tightly, judging harshly, and missing grace.

Everything Jesus did was to set you free. In John 8:36 we read: “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” The initial steps to regaining your freedom today is to choose in this moment to

Let Go of your impossible expectations…

Turn the control over to Christ…

Forgive yourself, your offenders and God…

Are you free?

Do you want to be free?

Then it’s time to unyoke from all the things that shackle you and trust God to unleash you into the life you were created for.

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Pain In The Ash

The season of Lent is almost here, it begins next week and flows from Ash Wednesday.

Interestingly enough, the huge celebrations of Fat Tuesday sprang up as a reaction to the imposition of religious ritual concerning the observance of Lent…a season in the church year whose focus is on repentance and realignment with God.

In and of itself, having a time of spiritual realignment is good for everyone…however, when the grip of religion laces its fingers around anything, it tends to strangle out the beauty and grace, and in their place are born rules, regulations and legalism.

Fat Tuesday, then, became the last opportunity before the 40 days of Lent to go and sin wildly. As I ruminate on this, isn’t that always what happens in our lives when rules replace relationship? When we live by a check-list of dos and don’ts, we begin to think and respond in contractual terms instead of relational exchanges. When this happens, we experience Fat Tuesday’s surrounding every area of our life.

For instance, when a marriage becomes contractual exchange, then love is something that is earned in light of certain actions having been done well. And, contractually, if certain actions are not done, or are not done to the expectation of the other person, then love is contractually withheld until those things are accomplished.

This is not a marriage though, it is a contract based on rules. A relationship that is based on an unconditional covenant understands that sometimes things don’t always happen or get done the way we want, desire, or expect, but since the marriage is based upon covenant love, love is always infused regardless of contractual performance.

You might also see the Fat Tuesday effect in marriage happen when a spouse is bound by duty to “do something” “be something” or “go somewhere he/she doesn’t want to go.”  Since he/she did their contractual duty they feel justified to over indulge some area as a “reward” for their work. Maybe a husband finds justification in going on an extended hunting trip because he just got word that his In-laws are coming to stay for an extended period, so he needs to get out-of-town for a while before that happens and his In-laws rules cramp his style…or perhaps a wife limits out the credit card on a spa day because her husband’s college buddies are due the next day, and since she is being the “good wife” and allowing it, she’s gonna splurge!

Do you see how contractually we live? Do you realize contractual living, or religious living results in the creation of Fat Tuesday’s? When genuine love and relationship fills our world, we can enjoy life, have fun and not feel guilty about it! Isn’t that a novel concept. Religion creates Fat Tuesday’s…Fat Tuesday’s create guilt and shame…Guilt and shame turn a powerful season of grace and alignment like Lent into a ritualistic experience of dos and don’t devoid of their real meaning.

When we approach God contractually, we turn something that is holy, cool, and cosmically awesome like Ash Wednesday or Lent, into a check list of contractual duties to appease God into liking us again…This is so far away from the God revealed through Christ.

If we would live in a sense of daily alignment, in other words, simply realizing that God is for us, not against us, and that as we make mistakes, or perhaps over-indulge in something that isn’t good for us, we stop, and have a relational conversation of confession, repentance and forgiveness. God isn’t standing by with the lightning bolt of contractual misuse ready to smite us, but rather is simply waiting for us to say…“man, I blew that one, I’m sorry, please forgive me..”

In that moment, the spirit of religion is thrown out the window, and a relationship is born. Religion focuses on rules to keep you in line. God invites you into a relationship, where the interactions are based upon a mutuality of love.

Because I am so grateful that God loves me on my best days as well as my most abysmal days, I look forward to a season like Lent not in such a way that compels me to go out and get bombed out of my skull because I won’t be able to drink for the next 40 days, but instead, I long to have a season offered to me where I can realign my thinking process with God’s…Where I can experience grace in the midst of economic trials…Where I can be reminded that God doesn’t care about how well I perform for Him, only that I love Him, and He is thrilled that I simply showed up!

Maybe what I am saying is that an excessive emphasis on rules naturally finds its outlet in sin or doing things that we normally wouldn’t do if we lived relationally. Perhaps Fat Tuesday’s exist because the religious rules push people where they don’t need to be pushed. Maybe, just maybe, some of the dumb choices that are made in the Fat Tuesday’s of life wouldn’t happen if we understood God relationally and religiously…hmmm, I think I’m right.

What would be even more powerful is if we all realized that God intends our lives to fully experience fun..joy..laughter…and good times. Sure there are some incredibly hard valley’s we will go through, but the religionists among us seem to think that that is all that God wants us to experience…”Stay in the lines, only use these colors, don’t have fun if at all possible, chin up, gut in…etc.”

As I think of Jesus, and all his human interactions, I think of how often He was at parties, amongst friends, enjoying the things of life…not just sitting in Temple or Synagogue assailing Himself religiously. Jesus had an incredible sense of humor that is lost in translation from the Aramaic and Greek into English. He enjoyed living, had fun, and avoided the mistakes of the Fat Tuesday’s of life while enjoying all the celebrations of this life.

So on Wednesday this week (Ash Wednesday) take some time to remember that you are human, a creation of God’s, made of earth, and that one day you will return to the elements of this planetary creation. In light of that truth, ask God to help you realign your heart and soul to His, not because you are doing all the right things, but because He is such a great God who loves you and will never leave you in the hard moments of life.

If you’re in the Seattle area, come and hang with me for an Ash Wednesday service at Snoqualmie Valley Alliance…it starts at 6:00 and will be interactive, reflective and powerful, you won’t want to miss it!

And guess what, you won’t walk away feeling guilty (that’s religion) but you will leave feeling the freedom that comes from our God of Grace and Truth.

Monty

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It’s Time To Get Back To Church

September 16th (next weekend) is national Back to Church Sunday…For me the fact that there actually is a “National Back To Church Sunday”  is a mixed love-hate relationship. The campaign exists because summertime is full of trips, excursions, vacations and a million other adventures that can easily draw you away, knowingly or unknowingly, from engaging with your community of faith.

On The Plus Side…

I love it (NBTCS) in the way that we have a re-gathering of people back towards the life of faith and community. The National Back To Church Sunday campaign works kind of like a get out of jail free card for truant church-goers who might be feeling some guilt or shame for being AWOL from the church for a while. I think we all need the occasional get-out-of-jail-free card. Theologically most people know that the church would easily welcome them back and that God is gracious, but often we are hard on ourselves and we create justifiable excuses to disengage.

Another group of people who disconnect from church are those who feel they don’t have anything to offer, or perhaps they are experiencing hard times financially and their inability to participate financially becomes for them a reason to stay away until they are in a better position to give. This absolutely breaks my heart and misses the point of why God established the church in the first place. I just want to see you, not your cash.

A community of faith is supposed to be the place where guilt is forgiven and the person is freed from the weight of Shame. The church is supposed to be a place where you are loved and supported particularly if you have hit some hard times financially or other. Shame on the church if it continue to places loads of guilt on people, and erecting barriers to the life of God’s community.

So maybe you have elicited some of those reasons, or reasons noted in the video, for staying away from church. If you have, it’s time to get some good theology, and immerse yourself back  in the atmosphere where God can more powerfully work in and through you. This will begin to address the areas of struggle or doubt and realign you with the grace and abundance of God. You’ll be amazed at how God has designed the church to be a safe place, a forgiving place, a guilt-free place so that you can grow some serious spiritual muscle.

It has been about a 100% truism in my 26 years of ministry that those who for whatever have disconnected from the life of God’s community of people are the ones who are in the most desperate need of what it can truly offer.

So the love side of this equation for me is that I would say to you”Come home…the door is open and the light is on and you’ll find whatever you need in the fridge…no cost, no story, no guilt, no shame, we just simply miss you and long to journey together with you! So come this Sunday and reestablish some powerful God-patterns in your life!

On the minus side…

The hate side of the equation for me is that we even have to have a day called “National Back To Church Sunday.” God is at work in and through His people all the time, yet we forget Him and the spiritual life so easily. I love being with God’s people. I love my community of faith…I love the energy that transpires between a full congregation and the pastors…this makes for a greater dynamic in the worship, preaching, energy and total experience.

I know that church happens every day, but there is something powerful about the gathering of God’s people as one family each week whether that is on Saturday or Sunday. The overwhelming sense of God’s presence revealed as peace, power and empowerment is something that I truly long for everyone to experince…not just once in a while…but whenever we gather together.

While God is with me everywhere I go, there is something mysterious about a community of grace gathering together…so I wish we didn’t have to have a day to try to market going back to church as if it was another American commodity…it makes me sad.

So my mind wanders and prays…

O’ God, that we would become a people who desire you and long for you above all things…
O’ God, may you remove our bad theology of toxic faith that make the church a bunch of dead rules and regulations that so easily create justifications for disengagement…
O’ God would you show up in such a way as we gather that the greatest human experience fades in comparison…
O’ God may we not turn church into something other than your people gathered to center on your centrality
…..love each other unconditionally
………..serve each other and our communities passionately
……………….and hear your voice through Word and Heart
…………………….and make Jesus famous by our actions.

So I wish there didn’t have to be a National Back To Church Sunday, but I’m glad there is one so that grace can again be the ingrediate that lathers us all in God’s love as the prodigals return.

So would you go out there this week, and with grace and authenticity, invite that friend, family member, or co-worker to get back to church with you…It just might be the most spiritual thing you do all week as you choose to reengage…no need to say where you’ve been…just show up, the Body of Christ needs you, and God is waiting for you to move in faith…I promise you, He’ll reach you before you reach Him 🙂

~Monty

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7 Father’s Day Ideas

Ah Father’s Day. It’s the day that Home Depot executives smile and the BBQ industry dances a little jig. On Mother’s Day the restaurants are over-booked for that special brunch, but Father’s day…argh…it’s about dad’s BBQ genius demonstrating why God chose him to be a  man and that there is no better!

I still have countless Father’s Day artifacts from both Emma and Liam at various stages of life. A construction paper tie; a box to hold manly stuff-and-things; pictures drawn with love and garnished with various colored food items from the fridge. Mostly, I have memories that I don’t ever want to lose. It is amazing how little our kids remember about their growing up years. Events and trips that are forever embedded in my heart and mind retrieve a complete “huh” from my kids when I ask them if they remember.

So I think that the best way to celebrate Father’s Day this year is to consider some things that you won’t find at Home Depot or the Nordstrom Rack. Here are seven powerful suggestions for a Father’s Day that might surprise you, but as a dad, I think they have some real potential.

1. Retell a Favorite Story:

Take a moment and think back…Do you remember that special trip, or school event or perhaps it was a baseball game that your dad was at and it meant the world to you. Write a one page letter retelling the story and let your dad know that he truly made that day special for you  and that you will always remember it. Be detail oriented, fill in the memories!

2. The Gift of You:

You have probably figured out by now that the older you get the faster time dissipates. One of the best gifts you can give your dad is the gift of your presence. The gift of your presence is spelled T-I-M-E, hang out together. Write up a little card that is redeemable for some time to  do whatever, fish, hang, go to a movie. Your dad knows that your life is busy, but he would love to have some time to simply be with you.

3. Advice List:

Men are wired as fix-it pros. We morph and come alive when we can help, make a difference or fix something. Most dad’s dread the day when they are no longer needed. For a dad, fixing your stuff and/or your problems is energizing, However, as you got older and smarter, you needed dad’s fix-it help less. This Father’s Day prepare a list of questions asking for his advice on various things from relationships to clogged sinks!

4. Your Dreams:

As a dad, I want to know what stirs my kids’ soul. What do they dream about? What are they most passionate about? How would they like to be a Planet Changer? Where does their mind go when they have time to think? So give your dad a visionary list of the deep desires God has infused into your soul. Share the whys and the whats about your passions and let him explore the possibilities with you.

5. His Dreams:

Have you ever taken the time to ask your dad about his dreams, his passions, his goals? We so often forget that our parents are people too! And that just like us, they too have God infused dreams in their soul. Ask about the dreams that have happened. Ask about the dreams that didn’t. Ask about the dreams that were sacrificed so that you could have the life that you have. Parents have sacrificed much that goes unnoticed by their children, and the sacrifice was generally made for them. This conversation will give you a whole new perspective on who your dad is, and it will affect the way you invest in your future.

6. A Repeater:

How about giving your dad a gift that keeps on giving! A once a month hike…a weekly coffee meet-up…a mile or more walk every week…read the same book and get together to discuss it…a monthly movie date…it could be anything, just make it consistent!

7. Amnesty

Ok, let’s admit it, all dad’s blow it. All dad’s make mistakes. All dad’s need forgiveness. This gift of forgiveness might be the best offering that will bless both you and your dad this year. To forgive someone doesn’t mean that you are forgetting the past or denying a wrong-doing. It doesn’t mean that you are waiting for an apology or neglecting or approving of a sin… rather you are choosing to free yourself from a self-imposed prison of hate or anger that seeks revenge. The benefits of forgiving others is worthy of an entire post! We long for our dad’s to be perfect, and when they aren’t it can be crushing. Our ideals are altered and our reality takes a hit. This Father’s Day choose to look at your dad as a broken human just like you…a man who is imperfect, just like you…a person in need of grace just like you…Let this be the year that you choose to forgive and begin building a relationship that fills your soul.

Happy Father’s Day!
Monty