God of Silence and Sound

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God of silence and sound,

Help me dance around the spaces and textures of your voice.

In this moment, Holy One, speak new life into me

the way you spoke in beginning;

Brushstrokes of breath…

Colors of conversation…

Landscapes of language…

Allow the words that wound create in me a silent melody

which sings the song of genesis

of pain and promise

of purpose and presence

God of silence and sound,

Teach me to sing in the darkness of my day.

On this night, Holy One, sing over my tired soul

the way you refreshed Elijah;

as he slept beneath the tree…

as his anxiety obscured his reality…

yet still, you nourished his soul…

May the notes caress away the fear in my heart

which sings a song of captivity

of love lost and misplaced

of loneliness and isolation

God of silence and sound,

I know I am a singer of confused songs.

In this chaotic space, Holy One, teach me the tune of paradox

of beauty and ash, joy and sorrow, frivolity and sincerity.

Teach me to listen…

Help me to see…

Free my voice to sing without sound

The beautiful songs of Your love.

God of the Silent Moments

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O G-d of the silent moments,

veiling Yourself in mystery and question,

capture my soul…find me.

When Your people gravitate left and right,

and miss You in the shadowlands.

capture my soul…realign me.

As my grace turns to judgment,

reestablishing the barriers that you took down,

capture my soul…restore me.

Your silence creates a hunger,

but my diet is junk food,

a spirituality that makes you feel full, but has no nourishment.

Without your voice,

my choices fall into manmade categories,

and I miss the sliver of grace that defines Your love.

But when You speak so that I can hear,

I see things in a different light,

the log removed and the cheek turned,

O G-d, capture my soul

Things are not as they seem…

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Have you ever wondered what the mother of Barabbas thought, felt or wondered when her son was released and Jesus was condemned? If there is a universal character that represents all of us in the Good Friday story it is Barabbas…we have all been acquitted, set free from our sentence of death because Jesus went to the cross in our place…

Good Friday is the day we remember that life often has dark encounters where we are left wondering if God is real, kind, involved or aware.

Good Friday dares to combat our need to have life tied up in neat little bows…to always have happy endings…to ride off into the sunset…instead, it creates the sacred art of waiting….the holy transformation of not knowing…the necessity for all who follow Jesus to embrace the dark night of the soul where we learn the divine language of silence.

Jesus reminds us that in this world we will have trouble…He doesn’t say, “But if you believe in me I will make sure you experience zero troubles or pain!” No…he simply says ‘don’t be afraid of what you will face…trust me.’

But trusting God is hard when you are experiencing a Good Friday…”where are you God? Don’t you know what’s going on? Don’t you care?”

Like Pilate, sometimes we make choices that are pressured and forced. While we want to wash our hands of painful outcomes, we know deep inside that there is blood on them no matter how hard we try to justify our decisions…we are experiencing Good Friday.

Like Mary Magdalene…perhaps we have been helped, healed and transformed. Our life has been pulled from the gutter. Grace has invaded our world and for the first time we feel that we were valuable, needed even wanted. Our life is changing, our choices are evolving in healthier ways, our existence is becoming significant which is no small thing…and then we run into Good Friday…all seems lost…all seems hopeless…was it all a joke? Just another religious thing? The divine silence is so loud you could cut it with a knife…where are you God?…we are experiencing Good Friday.

Like Peter…perhaps we have been rescued and loved over and over again…we have received grace after grace yet we still put our foot in our mouth. When it mattered most, as someone was asking about our faith in Jesus, we froze…afraid of what they might think of us…afraid of how His name might affect our reputation or status…and in that defining moment, we deny Him, divert the conversation, bail on the one who always bails us out…and we feel the darkness of Good Friday surrounding our heart…Jesus, I’m sorry…

In different ways, by our words and by our actions our voice has joined the ancient chorus shouting crucify, crucify, crucify.

While we long to quickly jump from Good Friday to resurrection Sunday and shout “He is Risen” at the top of our lungs…Jesus asks us to stay here a while, to linger and suffer with Him…it is our own Gethsemane…but will we stay awake with Him just for a little while?

I think the images of Good Friday are flowing from the heart of the Apostle Paul as he says “I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death”  (Phil 3:10)

The reason why Good Friday is so important is because we can never truly enter into the full Joy of Easter Sunday until we have embraced the absolute emptiness, and despair of Good Friday…We will never exude joy until we have encountered a necessary grace born on the dark night.

Good Friday centers me on the truth that things are never as they seem…it might be Friday…things might be confusing and dark…but God is always up to something, and Sunday is coming..

Here’s a great hymn to close out my thoughts…

Alas and Did My Savior Bleed

1. Alas! and did my Savior bleed,
and did my Sovereign die!
Would he devote that sacred head
for sinners such as I?

2. Was it for crimes that I have done,
he groaned upon the tree?
Amazing pity! Grace unknown!
And love beyond degree!

3. Well might the sun in darkness hide,
and shut its glories in,
when God, the mighty maker, died
for his own creature’s sin.

4. Thus might I hide my blushing face
while his dear cross appears;
dissolve my heart in thankfulness,
and melt mine eyes to tears.

5. But drops of tears can ne’er repay
the debt of love I owe.
Here, Lord, I give myself away;
’tis all that I can do.

Advent Longing…

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The Advent season is always pregnant with possibilities.

A subconscious knowing resides deep within gnawing, in an awakening way, opening eyes and heart to a truer reality available only to those who seek it.

There is so much more to life…there is a deeper peace… a greater capacity to love…an irremovable anchor of hope.

Imagine feeling an inescapable smile, an unexplained joy resonating deep within, and a sliver of grace that pierces your soul for no apparent reason.

These are around and available all the time, yet we rush around with Black Friday hearts and choose to settle for far less than God graced our planet with and offers through  benefits of the Incarnation.

I like what Thomas Kelly, a 20th century Quaker wrote:

“Over the margins of life comes a whisper, a faint call, a premonition of richer living which we know we are passing by. We have hints that there is a way of life vastly richer and deeper than all this hurried existence, a life of unhurried serenity and peace and power. If only we could slip over into that Center! If only we could find the Silence which is the source of sound!”  ~Thomas Kelly

The following line of Kelly’s causes me to pause, “We have hints that there is a way of life vastly richer and deeper than all this hurried existence, a life of unhurried serenity and peace and power.” Ah…he is onto something here.

This is not a pipe-dream for God lovers and seekers, rather it is available, right now right where you are. No matter what stress, struggle, hurt or habit has you submerged, Advent shouts  God came to earth…God came and infused His divinity with humanity…Jesus, then is the definition of who God is…Jesus came to rescue, not condemn, and He offers everyone a better hope of drawing near to God.

Advent also reminds us of longing…the longing for Messiah to come…

The longing for God to show up…

The longing for help beyond our capabilities…

The longing to know that we all matter, and that God cares and is involved…

The longing for the better hope of God’s presence,

May you slip over today into that center and find the silence which is the source of the sounds of life.

Monty